Don't Have Sex Yet....But Why?
Updated: Sep 11
Disclaimer: This post was previously published under my old blog, MyPennedHeart
If you are a believer and even if you aren't, it is more than likely that you have heard the phrase, "save yourself for marriage". Wait, wait, wait, before you close this post, please give me a chance. While working with teens this is a topic where there are so many questions, especially as believers. The main question is always, "why?" (outside of pregnancy and std's)
The Bible says so, isn't the complete answer being looked for, but it is usually the answer given.
1 Corinthians 7:36 ESV If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin.
You know this much already but want to know why. What you are seeing and hearing all over social media, television, movies, radios and everywhere else is that sex is great. Do it as much as you can, with whoever you want. You might break up and that hurts, but it is going to hurt whether you have had sex or not. Yes, breakups hurt no matter what, but when you add sex into the mix, it is a whole new kind of hurt. It may feel the same at first but once you are married and dealing with sins of the past, the hurt surfaces in a whole new way. God tells us that we become one when we give our bodies to another.
Mark 10:8-9 ESV the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
When you have sex with someone, you are becoming one with them and that cannot be undone. You will forever have a bond to one another whether you like it or not. When I talk to teens and young adults I always use the example of first kisses because most of them have had one and are no longer with that bf/gf. I always ask what they think about when someone says, "first kiss". Of course, their answer is, "my first kiss". Absolutely! I am 35 and when I hear those words my mind takes me back to the memory of my first kiss too.
Now imagine that you are married and sitting with your wife and friends and someone is talking about sex for the first time. Maybe it was a honeymoon night for them or maybe it was out of wedlock, either way, where do you think your mind is going to go? Yep, you guessed it. Your mind is going to go back to that memory of your first time. How are you going to feel when that first time isn't your wife/husband sitting next to you? Why even deal with that when you don't have to? Save yourself for you and for your future spouses well being.
God isn't trying to ruin your fun
God doesn't tell us to wait for marriage because he wants to take away the fun. He doesn't say no because he thinks you don't love each other. No, he is saying to stay pure not only for you but for your future spouse. God created sex to be an intimate experience between a man and his wife. An experience that only the two of you share. A memory that you won't have with anyone else. It is a physical, emotional, love bond that will hold you together. God never wants you to be making love to your spouse and have an old memory of someone else come along and screw up the moment. He wants better for you and your future spouse.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 ESV Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
Every other sin a person commits is outside the body! Wow, sexual sin is the only sin that affects us on the inside and outside. Christ died to save us, we (our bodies) were bought with a price. Not only that but the Holy Spirit lives within us. He lives within our bodies. We are forever connecting part of our body and who we are to someone else when sharing our physical selves with them.
There are always consequences to our sin
I wish that I would have been told all these ramifications to sexual sin when I was younger. I feel forever blessed that although I fell into sexual sin, my sin was only acted out with my now husband. That doesn't mean that what I did was right or ok. It simply means that we don't have all the same ramifications that some deal with. Believe me, we still had to deal with our sin and what it meant for our future.
Young people! It is so important to guard and save your body for your future spouse. Protect your body and your mind from the future pain. Protect your spouse from pain and doubt. God really does have your best interest at heart. His rules are not for any other reason than to protect you. To set you up for all the goodness his plan has to offer. No one wants to think of the possibility of being compared to someone else, especially in this regard. Protect one another!